A Russian story of life
by HodrichMaid
Summary: High School AU. Telling part of my life through the perspective of a teenage Ivan Braginski. More chapters to come, if you like it. Uke!Russia
1. Body Issues

Ivan sighed sadly and looked down when he saw the reflection of his clothed body in the mirror. He was dressed in his uniform and still looked horribly chubby, and the voices in his head made sure to tell him that every time. He had been hearing voices in his head that told him all his flaws for a year now, and his mother had already taken him to a psychiatrist who had prescribed him several pills and a traumatic psychiatric hospitalization. It had happened a couple months ago, and yet, it was still fresh in his mind.

"Come on, brother, we will be late for school!"

Ivan sighed once again and slowly walked down the stairs and out of the house after saying goodbye to their mother. In the bus, he sat at his usual place: the back, surrounded by his sisters. Natasha was sitting dangerously close to him and put her arm around his waist, and Ekaterina was looking out the window, absentmindedly.

"Hey, commie"

Alfred said, sitting down in the row in front of him with his brother, Matthew, who was always ignored by everyone except from Ekaterina, who had a small crush on him and Ivan though that it was reciprocated. Anyways, Alfred was the most popular guy in his class and was Ivan's crush, and had been for quite some time, ever since he moved in from Russia, more precisely. He always bothered him about communism and the old rivalry the United States and the Soviet Union; basically, he was almost always a jerk, but a respectful jerk. He had never mocked him for his weight, thank God.

"Hello, Alfred. How are you today?"

"I'm fine, and you?"

Alfred asked, without caring for the answer. Natasha tightened his grip around his brother's middle and he just tried to scoot away from her. She had a creepy way of loving him. Natasha loved him the way he wanted Alfred to love him. He had confessed his feelings for other boys to his sister and his mother, but the latter had decided to stay in denial and said she would only be convinced when he introduced him to a boyfriend. He had laughed and said that it would take a **long** time for that to happen, with sadness in his voice. His sister was different. She had said that she had already known it for some time and was relieved when he confessed to her. She had supported him. He had yet to tell Natasha. That would be something. Suddenly, when he was about to answer Alfred's question, the voices began yelling at him.

"_You will never have him! He is perfect, and you are fat! You will die alone in a flat living with your cat! Face it!"_

He covered his ears and pulled his knees up against his chest, surprising both his sisters and Alfred who was about to turn around to face the front when Ivan began... he didn't even know what was happening to him. Ekaterina rubbed his back soothingly and Natasha hugged him protectively, making him feel more uncomfortable.

"What's wrong, commie?"

Alfred asked, genuinely concerned. His brother Matthew turned around and was surprised, too. He had seen Ivan running off from the classroom once, during Geography class a couple months ago, just before he started skipping school for a very long time, or going sporadically. He had always wondered what had happened to Ivan to make him act that way. He had always been a sick kid, several times in the past he had skipped school for health issues and he had even used a walker for half a year. Natasha hissed at Alfred to leave him alone like an angry cat.

It was going to be a very long day.


	2. A Dream and a Hope

As expected, the day was long and tedious, but Ivan was able to handle it well. He actually didn't feel like going to school would do anything to alleviate his pain, seeing as he had no friends other than his sisters who were in different classes because of their age difference, so he was mostly alone during the day. He could be with Matthew, but that would be weird, given that they didn't talk much. They never talked, actually.

"Hey, commie, can I talk to you?"

Alfred said after the bell had signalled the end of the classes for the day and everyone was leaving. Ivan was confused and decided to stay seated to hear whatever Alfred had to say. He thought perhaps he was going to ask him something about the episode in the bus. Ekaterina and Natasha appeared at the door, waiting for their brother, but he made a sign with the hand for them to wait them outside while he talked to Alfred.

"What do you want, Alfred?"

Alfred turned around the chair in front of Ivan to talk to him face to face. He took off his glasses. Ivan was thinking that perhaps he wanted to talk to him about something serious, but they hardly ever talked other than the usual jokes. Alfred sighed before starting to speak.

"Well, you know how I always bother you and call you a 'commie'? I-It's because I like you"

Ivan was really happy. Alfred seemed sincere, and perhaps he could have a friend after all. If he liked him, they would be friends. That was the way things worked in Ivan's head. He was excited, to say the least.

"Well, thank you. Then we can be friends..."

"No, Ivan, you don't understand"

Alfred sighed and said, a little exasperated, and embarrassed for what he really wanted to say. Ivan didn't understand, indeed.

"What do you mean, then?"

Alfred stood up suddenly and grabbed Ivan by the shoulders, pulling him flush against his chest, with the desk in the middle. When Ivan's wide open eyes met Alfred's, their lips connected but it wasn't Ivan who took the initiative. The Russian boy was surprised by the sudden contact and blushed madly. Alfred had already closed his eyes and was enjoying the kiss as much as he could. When they parted, it was not by Alfred's choice.

"What was that?"

Ivan asked, breathlessly. He had felt fireworks when Alfred's lips touched his and a thousand butterflies in his tummy, but then had decided to break the kiss when he thought that perhaps this was all an elaborate joke. Alfred looked down, blushing madly, obviously embarrassed.

"I thought that perhaps you would like it... they way I liked it. It took me a while to understand what I felt for you, but when I did, I realised that I liked you more than a friend even though we had never been such thing. I hope you understand what I'm talking about now"

Ivan was stunned by Alfred's confession; without thinking twice, he grabbed Alfred's cheeks and kissed him passionately.

"Ivan... Ivan... Ivan... Brother!"

Ivan was startled and awoke from a heavy sleep when there was no one else in the classroom but himself and his sisters, who were looking down at him in his desk. He soon realised he was dreaming again and his expression saddened. Ekaterina noticed, but Natasha was too busy looking at her watch.

"Oh, brother, I'm sorry for waking you but it's time to go home"

He then remembered that he was in the last class of the day when the teacher, a kind old man, had told him to sleep when he realised how bad he was feeling, and then he had started dreaming about Alfred again, and again had become sad realising that it was all a dream.

"_Quit it, fat boy! You will never have him! What do you think Alfred would do if he knew about your silly crush? Laugh at you! Because you are ridiculous! ... Fat boy"_

"Shut up!"

Ivan yelled when the voices began speaking to him. But they were right. Alfred would laugh at him if he found out about his crush on him, because he was fat and unattractive... and, above all, he was a boy.


	3. Valentine's Day and the Expert of Love

Two weeks had passed, and it was the most dreaded day in Ivan's calendar: Valentine's Day.

The snow falling hard outside the window remembered Ivan of his motherland and made him a little homesick, something the family sometimes shared. He didn't want to go to school that day, because he would feel even more alone than he really was, without friends or a boyfriend: especially a boyfriend, in Valentine's Day, but his mother had said that she had to go to work that day and couldn't take care of him if he stayed home, so he had been practically forced to attend school.

"_All alone in Valentine's Day, how pathetic"_

Ivan covered his ears and shut his eyes, not caring if anyone saw him, he began rocking back and forth as the voices carried on calling him 'pathetic', 'fat' and 'crazy fag' something he had heard a lot of times in the past from the voices. Suddenly, a hand was placed on his shoulder and he stopped rocking and turned around to face Francis Bonnefoy, member of the so called Bad Touch Trio, the most popular boys in the class... and the whole school. He was the self proclaimed Expert in Love.

"What wrong, mon ami?"

Ivan looked around and saw that there was no one else in the classroom. Lately, he found himself in that situation more than once, all alone in an empty classroom, except this time he was not alone. Francis was there with him. He had always admired Francis. He had a sexy French accent, a beautiful body and was everything Ivan wanted to be: popular, well-loved and skinny.

"I... I have a problem, Francis... I'm sick"

He wasn't sure he should trust Francis, but he couldn't hold it in anymore. Everything that had happened to him, but to his eyes he seemed sincere. He didn't know if it was a hallucination or what, but the Francis he had in front of him wasn't the same boy who was always flirting with the guy with the bushy eyebrows he didn't remember the name of. He looked genuinely concerned.

"Tell me. I promise I won't tell anyone. I'm here to help you"

Ivan sighed and rested his head in his palm as he felt Francis' hand petting his soft hair delicately. He then decided to tell him everything.

"I've been hearing voices inside my head for several months; I was institutionalized in a psychiatric clinic, and I'm taking so much medication I don't even know where I'm standing"

Ivan couldn't believe he had just confided in a complete stranger but Francis looked sympathetic and suddenly he hugged him, catching him off guard. He had never been hugged by another boy. He had never been hugged outside his family.

"It's okay, I understand how difficult might be what you are going through, and you did the right thing by confiding in someone else. It is not good to keep those things to yourself"

Francis had never seen such a broke boy. He was feeling sorry for poor Ivan and decided that he would help him at any cost. A tear slid down Ivan's soft, pale cheek and Francis wiped it away. Then he couldn't hold it in any longer and began to cry, making Francis feel even sorrier for him.

"Don't worry, Ivan. I'm here. I will always be here"

And then Francis made a vow to himself to protect Ivan from everything that could hurt him, even from himself.


	4. Protect and Care

When Ivan had finally calmed down and stopped crying after Francis had given him a handkerchief, he got up and went to his desk, where he pulled out a red rose from the bouquet he always seemed to be carrying around and approached Ivan, who was looking down at his desk, wiping the single tear that fell from his violet eyes.

"This is for you"

Ivan looked up from the desk to the rose on Francis' hand and the charming smile on his face. For the first time in his life, he felt **loved** by someone else than his family. Not the way a boyfriend would love him, but the way his own family would love him. In that moment, he felt Francis as part of his little family or his only friend.

"This rose is for me?"

Ivan's eyes were huge and teary, and Francis felt a little pressure in his chest when he saw that cute face looking so broken. He smiled warmly and placed the rose on Ivan's hands.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Ivan"

Surprised by the sudden gesture, and unable to contain his excitement, he hugged Francis by the neck.

"Thank you, Francis"

"Don't thank me, Ivan, it was my pleasure. I don't want to see you like that"

Francis helped Ivan get up from his desk and carried his backpack on their way outside, even though Ivan had said he could carry it himself. Francis decided to make a little stop in the bathroom for Ivan to wash his teary face. In the bathroom, Ivan couldn't help but seeing himself in the mirror and looking down in embarrassment for his body. Francis noticed the sudden change of attitude of the Russian boy and decided to ask him about it.

"What's wrong, mon ami? Are you alright?"

Ivan looked up from the tile floor to Francis' worried face and tried to smile, but he couldn't.

"Y-Yes, thank you"

He proceeded to wash his face, but Francis put a hand on his shoulder and stopped him. He looked at him knowingly and Ivan sighed, knowing that he couldn't hide it from Francis. He didn't know what was it, but he couldn't help but feeling that he couldn't hide anything from him, even though they had never spoken before, he felt cared for when he looked at Francis' eyes, and that allowed him to trust.

"You wouldn't understand"

Ivan said sadly. Francis crossed his arms over his chest.

"You won't know unless you tell me"

Ivan looked at himself in the mirror and looked at the difference between him and Francis. He was a little taller than Francis, but not too much, but the latter was way more stylized than him. He was thinner, of course.

"I'm fat"

Those two simple words summarized his years of anguish and depression. Francis smiled.

"You are not fat, Ivan, don't say that"

"Please, Francis. I don't want to hear that, because we both know I am"

Ivan said with a dark tone in his voice, grabbing a hold of the lavatory, with his eyes hidden by his fringe. Francis was a little scared by the sudden change of tone in Ivan's childish voice, but didn't demonstrate it. Francis put his hand over Ivan's pale one and rubbed circles in his back.

"I think you look fine... and why are you so worried about that, anyways?"

Ivan sighed deeply and looked up at the mirror, where he saw Francis' and his own face.

"Because, then, nobody would love me"

Francis laughed because what Ivan was saying was just absurd to him, even though it might be a little rude to laugh at Ivan's problems. And he thought that.

"Are you laughing at me?"

"Of course not"

"Then why are you laughing?"

"Because what you are saying just doesn't make sense: people love each other for what they have inside, not for their body, and if they love you for your body, then they don't really love you. Love is in here"

Francis said softly, putting his hand over Ivan's heart and then dragged it as softly as he was speaking, down to his tummy.

"Not here and you are beautiful both on the inside and on your outside"

Ivan couldn't get a grip on what he was feeling. He had just been **touched** by another boy! But the most important thing was that he had been reassured about his body by someone who, until a couple minutes ago, had been a perfect stranger. Ivan hugged Francis and couldn't help a tear escaping him. He was truly touched by Francis' little speech.

"Thank you, Francis. Now let's go, my sisters must be waiting for me outside"

Nevertheless, that night, the voices started screaming at him, forcing him to hide underneath the covers of his bed, crying.

"_Don't listen to that fag! You are fat and ugly and you always will be!"_

But he saw the rose on the small vase in his bedside table, he felt protected by Francis, who, in his own room a couple blocks away from Ivan's, couldn't stop thinking about him.


	5. The Bad Touch Trio

The following day at school, which was a Friday, during lunch Francis had invited Ivan to seat at his table with his two other best friends. He said it was because he wanted all his friends to meet. The guy with the bushy eyebrows, Arthur according to Francis, was glaring from the table he shared with Alfred, Matthew and a little boy who looked exactly like him, at the four of them as they laughed over something that Gilbert, who was Francis' East German (or Prussian, as he liked to call it) best friend, was telling.

"And then I was all like 'Yeah, let's go to your place' and when we were in The Moment, if you know what I'm talking about, she took off her dress. Needles to say that the 'girl' had a Wurst the size of a trunk"

The four of them began laughing and Antonio, Francis' Spanish friend (It was amazing how many children from other countries attended that school), spit his milk all over the floor as he was crying from laughter. Ivan tried to hide his laughter behind his scarf, as he was a little embarrassed of it.

"Oh, it came with a surprise!"

Francis said in a high-pitched, sing-song voice and everyone kept laughing, attracting stares from other tables. Ivan had never laughed so hard in his entire life. His tummy hurt and he was starting to not care so much if they though his laugh was a little too... girly for a boy his age. Antonio was trying to drink his milk again, but he kept laughing, so he couldn't and that simple fact made everyone erupt in laughter once again.

"The best part is... I didn't turn her down!"

Gilbert said, before the four of them exploded in laughter again. Ivan wiped a tear from his eye.

"You are very funny, Gilbert"

Ivan said, breathlessly.

"Well, thank you, I know I'm awesome but I love when people **tell me **I'm awesome"

Ivan hadn't gone as far as telling him he was 'awesome', but for the sake of fitting in, he decided to go along with it.

"I like you, Ivan. I thought you are kind of creepy, but you are not, you are actually cool"

Gilbert said, with his glass in his hand, and then added, in a whisper and on a second thought.

"But not as cool as me"

Francis took his glass of milk and lifted it in the air.

"To Ivan, our newest member"

Ivan was mesmerized and his eyes were shining when he heard Francis toast for him and call him 'their newest member'. It was like a dream come true. He finally had friends! The other boys toasted with him and they carried on talking about random things. Secretly, from their table, both Alfred and Arthur were glaring at the Bad Touch Trio + One for two different reasons.

It was true that Arthur had a crush on Francis (how could he not, with that silky hair of him, and those beautiful eyes, and that soft-looking skin and that sweet, sweet bu... never mind) but he would caught dead confessing him, given that Francis had confessed to him a couple years ago and he had rejected him, back when he was a loner and had no friends, before the Bad Touch Trio gave him a boost of confidence and before he hit puberty... when he became a fine-looking boy.

"Look at it, the 'commie' had finally let the dark side and joined the... oh, forget it"

Alfred gave up trying to make a witty metaphor for Ivan's change of 'sides'. He was kind of jealous that the commie wouldn't be alone anymore; because that meant that he couldn't mess with him anymore in the bus given that he would be with his new-found friends that also took the same bus to school.

That night, Ivan was invited by Francis, Gilbert and Antonio to a sleepover at Gilbert's house, given that his parents were on a second honeymoon and his brother, Ludwig, would be locked in his bedroom studying like he always did or at his boyfriend Feliciano's house. So now the four of them were sitting on the living room carpeted floor over their respective sleeping bags in front of the television and the warm fire. Suddenly, Gilbert whispered something at the two other boys when Ivan asked for permission to go to the bathroom and when he returned, he saw the way the three boys were looking at him and felt a little uncomfortable.

"W-Why are you looking at me like that?"

Francis stood up and walked slowly to him. He then put his arm around his shoulders and brought him near the fire, where the three where sitting and made him sit down kindly.

"Ivan, mon chérie, do you really want to be a part of the Bad Touch Trio?"

Ivan was a little confused and surprised by the sudden question, given that he thought he was already a part of the gang, but apparently he wasn't yet.

"Yes, I do"

Ivan said enthusiastically, after thinking for a second. Francis smirked and looked at his two best friends. Gilbert crawled near Ivan, making him flinch backwards when he was inches apart from his face.

"Then you should know that there is a certain initiation rite you must perform"

Now Ivan was really confused and a little uncomfortable, because he felt that the three of them were approaching rather dangerously and for one second he thought whether it had been a good idea to come to Gilbert's house at all. Gilbert sat back down in his sleeping bag against the couch with his fingers intertwined and a smirk on his handsome face.

"There is a little thing you must know about our little club and **only you** must know about this. If anyone finds out at school we will know it was you and then your life will be, let's say... hell on earth"

Gilbert said menacingly, but his expression softened when he saw Ivan's scared look.

"Don't worry. We won't do anything bad to you. You are a cool guy. What you need to know about us first is that we are all bi... you know what that means?"

Gilbert asked when he saw the look of confusion in Ivan's face. It was really cute, to say the least.

"It means that you like girls and boys?"

Ivan asked, with his childish reasoning, making the three boys of the Bad Touch Trio smile.

"Exactly"

Francis said smelling a rose absentmindedly. There weren't any rose bouquets near, so Ivan didn't even imagine where he had pulled that rose from. Gilbert continued.

"Tell us, Ivan, do you like boys and girls, just girls or just boys?"

Then suddenly a feeling came over Ivan and was the same he had when Francis had asked him what was happening to him that day after class, and it was that he could confide in the guys that had just confided in him, so he decided to tell the truth.

"I just like boys"

Ivan said, decidedly with a pleased and childish smile on his face. Antonio laughed and clapped Gilbert in the back. Gilbert sighed annoyed, and Ivan immediately thought that it was because of what he had just said, so he would have understood if the guys just asked him to leave... although it would be weird because they had just said they were bi, so...

"I knew it, pay up!"

So it was a bet. Ivan felt a little bad that they were betting on who did he like, but didn't say anything.

"Well, now to the initiation rite, mon amour"

Francis said, approaching him the same way Gilbert had a couple minutes ago. Ivan was a uncomfortable again, and wondered if that was something normal in their 'meetings'.

"You have to make out with the three of us"

Those words hit Ivan like a train.


	6. The Sleepover

Ivan put his hand over his mouth in horror and shock. Francis, the boy he thought was his friend was no other than the pervert everyone said he was. He backed away from them as they began to laugh all of the sudden. Gilbert wiped some tears from his eyes and patted Francis on the back.

"I told you he would react like that!"

The three boys continued to laugh and Ivan felt the tension being lifted off from his shoulders magically and began to laugh, too, at his own prudishness. Of course, he wouldn't be caught dead kissing three boys at the same time... especially not those three.

"Don't worry, Ivan mon cher, we are not perverts as some people might think"

"They are right about you, though"

Gilbert said with a smile on his face, making Francis blush a little, though not too noticeably. Antonio kept laughing in the background.

"We only do that when there is nothing good on the TV"

"Antonio!"

The other two boys yelled at him, blushing madly. Ivan, who had laughed at the other's sudden comment, realised he was serious and decided to leave it that way.

"D-Don't listen to him, Ivan. But as you have confessed to us that you like boys and we had confided in you that we like both boys and girls, we want to know: are you uke or seme?"

Ivan was a little confused as he had never heard those terms before in his life. Gilbert looked, with a smirk at the other two boys and realised that Ivan didn't know what he was talking about.

"You don't know what that means do you?"

Ivan shrugged and waited for a response.

"Well, then, are you top or bottom?"

Francis asked, opting for use those terms instead of the first he had because he knew that Ivan didn't understand and he wouldn't want to explain _that_ to him with his friend there. Let's say that they were not the best people to have around while you are having The Talk. Francis groaned internally when he realised that Ivan wasn't getting that either.

"You mean... like, in bunk beds? I rather use the bottom, because I'm afraid that if I sleep at the top one, it will break... because of my weight"

He whispered the last part, looking down ashamed at his lap and with a faint blush in his cheeks. Francis felt a little bad when he heard Ivan's confession and caressed his hand. He looked back, his two best friends looked just like him.

"Well, um, no... mon cher, "top and bottom" means, well... when..."

Francis cleared his throat, uncomfortable. It was not that he wasn't comfortable with talking about sex, he was: he was the "God of Sexual Desire", like one of his many boyfriends had said in the past, but the fact that he had to explain it to someone as innocent as Ivan was a little awkward for him. Gilbert seemed to sense his discomfort and pushed him away, crawling dangerously towards Ivan, who backed away a little.

"W-What are you doing?"

Ivan asked, more uncomfortable than Francis was only seconds ago, and putting his hands in the air to push Gilbert back when he was inching too close to him. Gilbert didn't mind and instead sat down next to Ivan and put his arm over his shoulders to pull him closer. He spoke to his ear, seductively.

"Simple, do you like to _fuck _or _get fucked_?"

Gilbert's hand caressed Ivan's chubby thigh, making him shiver. Francis face-palmed and Antonio was looking intently, waiting for a response. Ivan swallowed hard and began to think, trying to ignore the hand going up and down his thigh. He had fantasised a couple of times with Alfred taking him in his arms, putting him down on a bed covered with rose petals and then, well, you know what's next. He felt a little nervous telling the boys about this, he didn't know what they would think of him. Gilbert was obviously a top, or seme, by the way he was close to Ivan and touching him like that.

"W-Well... I..."

Francis spoke up, interrupting Ivan, sensing his discomfort.

"For example, I am an uke, or bottom as they call it. I tried topping, but it's not my thing, I rather feel a big di... difference between those two. Yeah, that's it"

Francis corrected himself before it was too late, although Gilbert and Antonio had already caught on what he was saying and began to laugh loudly. Ivan's eyes were wide open in shock, but he shook his head and looked down to his lap to answer the lewd question once and for all.

"I'm a bo..."

Suddenly, the doorbell rang and everyone spun their heads to look out the window. Ivan sighed in relief internally and got up swiftly.

"I'll go"

He ran to the door and opened it, revealing a delivery boy with a black cap that covered his face because he was looking down at the pizza he had in his hands. Immediately, Ivan licked his lips. He was fat, he couldn't help it.

"Pizza's here"

He said with a tone of voice that seemed too fake to be taken seriously. Gilbert and Francis appeared from behind, both surprised to see a delivery boy standing at the door with a pizza in his hands. Antonio was sitting in his sleeping bag, watching a new commercial about feminine wipes. That boy was weird sometimes... and an idiot, some other times.

"Did you order pizza?"

Ivan asked Gilbert, but he looked really confused until an idea came to his mind.

"No, but I ain't gonna waste a free pizza"

Gilbert said, taking the pizza in his hands. Francis face-palmed for the thousandth time that evening and Ivan couldn't wait anymore to have a piece of that pizza, although he didn't want to say it out loud because he didn't want his new friends to tell him he was a pig. Francis was still suspicious about that delivery boy, so he approached him and swiftly, took off his cap.

"Alfred!"

Ivan and Gilbert looked up from the pizza box which had just been opened by the German, upon hearing the name of the alleged "pizza boy". Effectively, that was Alfred F. Jones standing in the door wearing a Pizza Hut uniform.

"W-What are you doing he-here?"

Ivan asked, terribly embarrassed by the fact that his long-time crush saw him drooling over a pizza. Gilbert laughed loudly and put the pizza on Francis' hands before going over to the door, where Alfred was still standing.

"Alfred, dude! I can't believe it. What are you doing here?"

"Alfred?"

Antonio came out of the living room upon hearing the commotion from the entrance. "Great, _Dumb_ledore is here!" Francis thought, rolling his eyes. Antonio smiled broadly.

"Oh, Alfred, you are here just in time. Ivan was about to tell us if he is a top or a bo..."

"Antonio, it's time for your medicine"

Ivan said, with a blank expression on his face, whilst Francis was terrified of what he was about to spit out in front of someone who didn't belong in the group and could ruin Ivan's life at school by telling them he liked boys.

"What medicine?"

Antonio asked as Ivan rolled up a slice of pizza and shoved it into his open mouth and down his throat, making him choke.

"That!"

Alfred didn't understand what was going on. Francis hurried to Antonio and began performing the Heimlich manoeuvre on Antonio, whose eyes were watering. Ivan closed the pizza box and left it on a small table at the side of the door.

"What are you doing here, Alfred?"

Alfred looked reluctant to speak and Gilbert smacked him at the back of the head as he pushed him inside the house and closed the door behind them.

"Talk, or else..."

Alfred still looked reluctant to speak and Francis, who had managed to bring Antonio back to life and had laid him down on the couch to rest. He grabbed the slice of pizza from the floor and placed it on Alfred's lips.

"...or else I will make you eat this"

"Ok, ok! I will tell you! Just keep that thing away from me"

Alfred said, putting his hands up high. Francis threw the wet slice of pizza away. Alfred sighed and everyone looked at him expectantly.

"W-Well, I... I..."

Alfred sighed.

"I wanted to see what the commie was so excited about and I overheard you guys talking about a slumber party at Gilbert's"

"Don't call it that way!"

Gilbert said annoyed, causing everyone to laugh... except Antonio, who was still resting from Ivan's "attack". Francis gave a step forward, his arm around Ivan's shoulders.

"Well, then, if Alfred is here... what do you say about a little game of Truth or Dare?"

Francis said, mischievously. Gilbert laughed, Alfred nodded reluctantly and Ivan almost passed out.


	7. Truth or Dare? I choose Dare

After Alfred called his mother and told her he would sleep over at Gilbert's, the game began. Francis had already sensed the tension between Alfred and Ivan, and was almost completely sure that the Russian had a crush on him because of the way he looked at him, with a not-too-noticeable dreamy expression and from the corner of his eye to avoid the other catching him. It was really subtle and not to noticeable for someone as bright as Alfred... which is as bright as Antonio, but Francis was the Expert of Love, after all.

The five of them sat down forming a circle in the living room floor. Alfred would sleep in the couch while the other four boys would do so in their sleeping bags, as it had been planned before the unexpected visit of a blonde dressed in a Pizza Hut uniform. Francis made Alfred sit down next to Ivan, and occasionally their sock-covered feet would rub and they would apologise, both blushing profusely.

"Ok, let the game begin"

Francis said with a smirk on his face, clapping his hands. He just hoped everything would go according to his plan. Alfred was a little nervous, he didn't want them asking him thing that the commie could use against him at school, so he decided to play it safe and go for dares, even though he didn't knew what kind of perverted ideas for dares did the Bad Touch Trio had. Ivan wanted to be swallowed by the earth as he didn't want to answer any of their inappropriate questions in front of his crush.

"Ok"

Alfred said, a little reluctantly and Ivan sweat-dropped. Antonio was just confused... as always.

"Very well, Alfred, truth or dare?"

Alfred though for a moment and decided to stick with the plan, so he chose dare. Unbeknownst to him, he was also sticking with Francis' plan, who rubbed his hands together. Gilbert was looking at him from the corner of his eye, already knowing what was going on Francis' mischievous mind.

"D-Dare"

"Excellent!"

Francis almost yelled, startling Antonio, who was thinking back dreamily of Lovino Vargas, a younger student at their school who had been his secret crush for several years, since he moved in from Italy with his brother Feliciano, who was Gilbert's brother Ludwig's current boyfriend, and according to Gilbert, his only love interest in his life. Lovino was a bit grumpy, but he was really cute and Antonio was sure that he could cure him from his grumpiness and make him the loveliest boy he had ever been with. Alfred and Ivan were also startled by the abrupt exclamation.

"Alfred, I dare you to kiss Ivan... _in the lips_"

He crawled until he was flush against Alfred's face, with a mischievous expression on his face and his ever present smirk, denoting his obscure wishes to the other. Gilbert tried not to laugh and Ivan wanted anything to happen rather than that. He wanted a serial killer to come through the door and kill them all before Alfred was forced to kiss him. It was not that he didn't want to, because when he had heard that, his heart had jumped a bit, but he didn't want his first kiss to be a dare.

"Wait, Ivan, this is your first kiss?"

Alfred asked, swallowing his own pride and calling Ivan by his name for the first time since they met. It was not always that he got to kiss a boy who had never been kissed before. _0h, crap_, Ivan thought. He hadn't realised he had said it out loud rather than think it in silence. He sighed and looked down at his lap in embarrassment before nodding timidly. Francis sat down in his sleeping bag, with a more noticeable smirk on his face. That was perfect for his plan. Ivan's first kiss would be with his crush.

"Then let's make it special"

Gilbert said before putting on some romantic music and making the lights of the living room dimmer for the encounter. Francis lit a couple candles from the candelabras at each side of the couch and took Ivan by the hand to the bathroom.

"What are you doing, Francis? I thought you were my friend!"

Ivan said in a whisper, in the verge of tears. Francis shushed him and hugged him tightly. It wasn't supposed to go like that for him. He was supposed to be thrilled for kissing his crush.

"Don't worry, mon chérie, it will be the most special kiss you've ever experienced... I know you like him"

Francis said, with a warm smile on his face, while applying some strawberry lip-balm to Ivan's plump rosy lips. The other was frozen in his place when he heard what Francis whispered lastly.

"H-How do you know that?"

Ivan asked, a little fearful. Francis giggled and rubbed his shoulders. They were the same height (*) so they could look at each other in the eyes. Ivan's beautiful purple eyes were watering and Francis didn't want him to cry. He was his friend, after all. His _only_ friend, he thought.

"I can tell by the way you look at him. I know how a boy in love looks like, I had seen it and I am myself"

He said, a little saddened by that last fact. It was true, he had never got over his crush in Arthur Kirkland, and that innocent crush had developed into a deep love, in spite of all the boyfriends he had had in the past. He was not promiscuous, he just wanted to find someone who could replace Arthur in his heart, because it was obvious that he didn't feel the same that he did for him.

"You are in love?"

Ivan asked, tilting his head to the side a little, in confusion. He though that Francis was a boy of occasional boyfriends, not the type of guy who would admit falling in love with someone else. Francis nodded sadly, he didn't want to talk about it, so he decided to change the subject.

"Let's get you even more beautiful than you are, ok?"

Francis asked, with a warm smile replacing his sad expression. Ivan shook thoughts about Francis' possible love interests from his head.

"O-Ok"

Francis ruffled his hair a little from behind, as now Ivan was looking at himself in the mirror. He liked the way he looked with his hair dishevelled, rather than coiffed as it always was. Francis then opened the three top buttons of his pyjama shirt, exposing his smooth pale skin.

"There, now you look beautiful"

Francis said, admiring his handiwork, but on a second thought, he took a strawberry from his pocket and washed it on the sink.

"Wait, eat this"

"W-Where do you take those things?"

Francis looked confused as Ivan was and looked down at the strawberry in his hands.

"I don't know... just eat it"

Ivan shrugged and ate the strawberry, which, according to Francis, would give him a nice taste in his lips. Once they were done, and Francis assured him he looked beautiful and irresistible for Alfred or anyone else, they returned to the living room. Gilbert was looking at the clock on the chimney.

"Great! What took you so long?"

Gilbert said, annoyed. Alfred was really nervous, but he couldn't take his eyes off Ivan. He looked as if he was glowing.

"Wow, Ivan, you look beautiful!"

Antonio said, mesmerized by the sudden change. Gilbert and Alfred looked as if they wanted to kill him, even though he didn't understand it that way, and Francis looked proud. A blush spread through Ivan's chubby cheeks, making him even prettier. He kneeled down in front of Alfred, feeling the whole weight of his body on his knees, making his thighs quiver a little.

"W-Well, I think it's t-time"

Alfred said, shivering a little. Everyone was expectant to what was going to happen and Ivan felt a knot in his throat, but swallowed hard and approached Alfred anyways. It was the first time he would feel his crush's lips on his' and had been waiting that for a long time, ever since he met Alfred and realised he had fallen in love with him.

Alfred looked into Ivan's eyes. He had never seen eyes so beautiful as his', violet was a very pretty colour and made Ivan's face gorgeous, with a nose a little too big but well dissimulated. A blush spread through his face and his nose made contact with the tip of Ivan's, making them both blush deeper than they already were.

The kiss was sudden.

Alfred didn't want to spend another second looking into Ivan's eyes and waiting for the contact of their lips, so he grabbed the Russian boy by the cheeks and crashed his lips against his', causing both of their faces to turn red as a tomato. Alfred's glasses crashed against Ivan's face. Alfred became immersed into the kiss; he had never felt lips so soft and tasted such delicious strawberries on the. His hands wandered down Ivan's smooth face and the soft skin of his neck to his surprisingly small waist. He brushed Ivan's love handles, making the latter shiver in pleasure and embarrassment. Ivan had never experienced anything like that in his life. He had never been kissed before, but he hadn't even _imagined _that it would feel this good.

Suddenly, he felt something he had only dreamed of: Alfred's tongue.

* * *

(*) In this story, teen!Ivan hasn't fully grown to be so tall as he currently is, he is around 177 cm, as tall as Alfred and Matthew.


	8. Heartbreaks

The kiss, or rather make-out, lasted until they were both out of breath and completely red from the tip of the ears to their pale chests. They pulled apart, gasping for air. Ivan touched his rosy lips with his delicate fingertips gingerly, with a dreamy expression on his face, almost lost in the sea of pleasure that was that kiss with Alfred, who, in turn, looked like he wanted to be anywhere else rather than there.

"Oh, Alfred..."

Ivan sighed. Francis looked pleased. His plan had gone even better than he had expected, but Alfred didn't seemed as pleased as he thought he would be after kissing such a beauty as Ivan, even if he didn't think himself as such. Ivan started to worry when Alfred looked like a runaway groom in his wedding day.

"... Is everything okay?"

Ivan asked. Alfred didn't know what he was feeling on the inside. It was the same strange feeling he had experienced when he saw Arthur Kirkland time several years ago. It was true, most of his pass through elementary school, he was in love with the grumpy British boy and he had been heartbroken to know that he didn't love him back. That boy was certainly a hard nut to crack when it came to love. He had rejected both Alfred in elementary school, even though they had vowed to remain as friends, partly because Alfred was the first and only friend Arthur had made upon coming to America with his family, and Francis in high school. Alfred had vowed to never fall in love with any other boy again, and for some time he had believed his heart had learned his lesson, but that kiss seemed to prove him wrong and that scared him so he did the first thing he could think of: run away.

He pushed Ivan aside, making him fall next to Francis on the floor and ran to the door, which he left open in his flight. He ran and ran until his legs gave out and he was forced to sit on the pavement. Under the dim street lights, Alfred began to cry. He couldn't believe someone was playing with his heart again.

Back at Gilbert's house, the three boys of the Bad Touch Trio were trying to get Ivan to open the bathroom door, as he had locked himself in when Alfred had ran away, partly because he felt so embarrassed that he had even allowed himself to think that Alfred would want anything with him after that passionate kiss; but even if Alfred was straight, that didn't explain why he had kissed Ivan that way, he had been so... romantic, like no one else had. Suddenly, cruel laughter echoed inside Ivan's poor mind.

"_Very well, fat boy, you got what you wanted. You kissed Alfred and he ran away because he couldn't' stand being with your fat self. Admit it, you two will never be together, it's time you realise it_"

"Shut up, please"

"_He ran away because you are the worst thing that has ever happened to him and to this world. You are fat, ugly and a disgusting fag, above all"_

"Shut up!"

He began to cry as he had never cried before, sinking his head between his knees, flush against his chest. On the other side of the door, the boys could hear Ivan's screams and crying and Gilbert ran upstairs to his mother's study and returned with a clip. He straightened it and successfully picked the lock of the bathroom door, opening it and slightly pushing Ivan, who was resting against the closed door. Francis kneeled down and hugged him. Ivan hugged Francis tightly as he continued to cry. Antonio didn't know what to do, so he handed Ivan a handkerchief. Ivan looked up at him with grateful teary eyes.

"Thank you, Antonio"

"D-Don't thank me, Ivan"

* * *

Days went by in a daze for both Alfred and Ivan, the later being devastated and tormented by the voices, and the former tormented by the faint shadow of love in his battered heart. On Monday morning, Ivan got up and like a zombie showered and brushed his teeth. He didn't want to school, he didn't want to face Alfred and neither did he. Alfred had already made up his mind. If he kept Ivan away from him, he would stay afloat and not sink in a sea of lovesickness. The farther away he kept Ivan, the better his heart would be, and he would do it the only way he knew how to do it, with his only weapon: bullying.

A couple seconds before the bus arrived, Ekaterina knocked on the door of Ivan's bedroom and opened it, finding her little brother sitting on the bed, looking depressed. She sat down in the bed next to him and put her arm around his shoulders. It was sure he had been crying due to his puffy red eyes and his quivering shoulders.

"Oh, brother, what is wrong?"

He sighed weakly. He didn't even have forces for that.

"If you promise not to tell mother, I'll tell you"

He said in a whisper, which gave Ekaterina the necessary confirmation that her little brother was suffering.

"I promise, now tell me... is it about a boy?"

He looked at her shocked. How could his sister know about it? In fact, both Ekaterina and their mother had known that Ivan liked that boy Alfred who lived on their neighbourhood, as he always talks about him and about any other boy, so he must like him too much. Natasha had denied the truth that laid in her face.

"It's Alfred... but _apparently _everyone else knows I'm in love with him, so it wouldn't shock me if you just said that you already knew"

Ivan said sarcastically, still looking down at his shuffling feet on the carpet of his bedroom floor. Katyusha hugged him closer to her and decided to do something to cheer him up a little.

"Oh, brother... at times like this, why don't you try using a spell?"

Ivan looked up, his red puffy eyes now more noticeable in the sunlight. Katyusha cringed a little, but not too obviously, she didn't want her brother to feel bad about it.

"What kind of spell?"

His voice was broken due to all the crying and she felt even sorrier for him, if that's even possible.

"On that I use all the time. It's good for telling people how you feel"

Ivan looked a little more interested in what his sister was saying now. She stood up and made a pose with her hand on her hip.

"All you have to do is show them your boobs!"

Ivan was about to say something when sadness struck him once again and looked down at the floor, shuffling his feet. He spoke in a whisper.

"I don't think he would be interested in my boobs"

Then he began to cry and Katyusha's heart clenched. She hated seeing someone she loved looking so hurt and depressed because of someone. In between sobs, Ivan managed to tell his big sister the story about the kiss in the game of Truth or Dare. She fumed in anger. How could that _brat_ do something like that to her beloved little brother? She wanted to kill him.

"I'm going to chop his head off with mom's knife"

"Please, sis, don't do anything that can put me in evidence in front of anyone"

Ivan said sadly, getting up from the bed and straightening his uniform in front of the full-length mirror. Katyusha sighed and got up, hugging her little brother from behind and resting her head on his shoulder.

"You are beautiful, Vanya, and one day you'll find someone who will love you as much as we do"

"I hope so"

He said before walking out of the room, leaving his sister in front of the mirror.

* * *

When they got in the bus, Alfred was sitting in the front, something weird given that he always sat at the back with his brother, who was sitting at their usual spot, looking down at his cell phone. Katyusha and Natasha – Ivan never realised how much the two nicknames for his sisters sounded alike – walked in front of him and when he was about to pass Alfred's seat and head to the back, he collided with the floor loudly, causing everyone to laugh at him.

He looked back to see if his shoelaces were untied, which would explain why he had fallen so hard, but what he saw made him freeze: Alfred was looking down at him with a smirk on his face and his leg extended, which had caused his fall. Everyone had stopped laughing and went back to their businesses. Ivan's eyes watered and he ran to the back of the bus, crying and hiding his face in his hands. Natasha was about to stand up and kill Alfred, but Ekaterina stopped her and consoled her brother when he sat down between the two of them.

"Don't worry, brother, you have me. You'll _always _have me"

Natasha said creepily, hugging her brother, who shivered a little with his sister's choice of words. Katyusha pushed her away a little and allowed her brother to cry on his shoulder. Alfred, from his seat at the front row, turned around and took in the scene in the back: Ivan crying on his sister's shoulder and Matthew apologising for his brother's behaviour. He turned back to look down at his lap. He couldn't believe what he had done and felt horrible for it, but that was the only way to keep Ivan away from him and keep his heart safe from another heartbreak.

When the bus arrived at the school, Alfred made eye-contact with Ivan, who was and looked heartbroken. Their stares mixed and lingered for a while until the bell rung signalling the start of classes and they both entered the building.


End file.
